tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53994751789612374712023-11-15T05:24:33.801-08:00A Balanced LifeA place to go and get some ideas to create balance in everyday life. Be empowered to heal your family naturally, using Young Living Essential Oils. Follow the adventures in the homeschooling of our two children. Find a balanced birth approach, with my insights about natural birth.balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comBlogger58125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-22194780411128923692014-07-12T01:44:00.001-07:002014-07-12T01:44:51.528-07:00Zen MamaI am seriously flying high! I could barely drive home from my Young Living Essential Oils Class. I was driving down the road and saw this new drive through coffee shop. I was thrilled to see someone open up a new place that wasn't a Starbucks. I thought, wow, that is so cool, someone had a passion, an idea, a dream, and didn't let fear hold them back. They opened a shop. No getting to the end of their life, wishing "I wish I had done... ". I love it! So then I got to thinking, gee, mom's need a place that they can go and calm down.<br />
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Whenever we want to go and teach a oils class or attend one, we have to leave our kids, so we can focus. This causes anxiety, stress, money (babysitter), etc. All the reasons we needed to go to the oils class to begin with! All these problems lead to inflammation, pain and disease. I had just left an amazing class, with a group of moms, struggling to help their children, ages ranging from toddlers to young adults. We all feel the same. We want healthy, happy children. Some of us have been dealt tougher cards than others, dealing with sensory issues, to Autism, to anxiety, depression, PMS, trauma, chronic pain, etc. When the class was over and I had ingested oils, diffused oils, applied oils. I was so clear headed, I couldn't believe I had about 5 hours of sleep, hiked down to the river, prepared for a class, made food to bring, and all with out caffeine or my favorite natural energy booster NITRO, Ningxia Red, sparkly water and Young Living Peppermint oil. I was even concerned that I wouldn't have the focus to teach my class. I worried as the facilitator, that I would get sidetracked and not be able to convey the information about these therapeutic grade essential oils.<br />
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Then I stopped and embraced where I was at, at that moment. I shared the intentions for the night and how we were regular moms, not doctors, not going to claim any magic cures, just here to share our passion for oils, our testimonials, our stories. We were not there to sell anything, just give information. We were there to hear their stories, foster community and to show what works for us. We encouraged people to write down information, to further imprint information in their brain. We passed around the starter kit, that consists of 10 essential oils you could use for any ailment you have and can replace any over the counter drugs and clean out the toxic cupboards. As we passed the oils and inhaled them, sometimes applying them, we heard information on the brain, the frequencies of the oils and how to be safe when learning to use the oils. We created a sacred space that women could share their concerns, ailments, struggles, questions. It was so courageous for these women to share what is really going on. One shared how she got off antidepressants with Young Living Frankincense and Ningxia Red. Another talked about anxiety, stress and anger, and the different roll on blends Tranquil and Stress Away. There was so much to share, in such little time, that many questions were answered, and some probably not. People wanted to know about pain, insomnia, skin issues, tendinitis, PH balancing, liver cleansing, autism and digestion. It could have gone all night. I walked in with two started kits and both were quickly sold.<br />
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I also shared an amazing book called <u>Releasing Emotional Patterns with Essential Oils</u>. I told the ladies that it took me a few years of learning the oils, their strength, ability and to trust that all I know, read and experience is true. It has been my experience, that when someone can't figure out their physical aliment, it is almost always an emotional issue. I explained how the book works and how you can look up a specific emotion, a point on your body or an oil you are drawn to. I am never surprised when it helps me identify what is going on. From me personally, friends, my 3, 10 and 13 year olds!<br />
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There was no need to tell my whole story and why or when I got involved with Young Living. I just trusted that my intentions were good, that I was there to honor people, different experiences and choices. I knew that all people usually want only good and are often too busy to take the time or make the time to learn. Those of us that host classes or parties at our homes are here to help our family and friends, sometimes even strangers at the park. We really feel passionate about health. When you look at the areas in your life, whether it be relationships, children, career, finance, fame, etc., if you are not addressing your health first, then the rest will not be balanced. When I look at my Feng Shui Bagua Board of nine areas, I always come back to the middle quadrant, health and fitness. If I do not apply the oxygen to myself first, I will not be able to help my family. I always thought that was odd, on a airplane, when the flight attendant would say that. Then I had kids and I started to see the importance of trusting your inner guide. Following your passions and belief's no matter what others were doing. Then you get to the logistics of that, or the excuses for why you can't do that. When you have the crazy life like mine, where my husband travels for a living 90% of the year, I have a hard time to remember to breathe, to find my own time, to find spa time, to have clarity, to look at my health.<br />
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I went to my OB earlier in the week, and was in the waiting room for over an hour. It was so upsetting, I was never updated on the wait time and it was just ignored that I had children at home or other plans. It became clear that everyone that worked there and visited there, were under the impression that harm is ok. That to make people wait that long, was acceptable. That it was normal. That this was part of taking care of yourself. You have to wait. When in actuality, it's not. You don't have to wait, 1 1/2 hours, to get to see your doctor for 5 minutes, for her to tell you that you should go get lab work and that the uterine polyp is probably not causing your 36 day period. For me to leave feeling harmed by the loss of time, causing stress, building anxiety, leaving me with no hope. Really?<br />
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If you are in this boat, the "I guess this is life.... sigh..". Why? You actually have a choice, to sit there and put up with the baloney or to find another option. That is what I did with health, birth, and school. I found another option. One that would keep my kids out of harms way. If they are in harm, where will that take them? Does harm foster a healthy life? Will this way lead to happiness and success? If harm is involved? No. This is not an opinion, it is the truth. I have been quietly speaking the truth, living the truth and sharing the truth, with those who were listening. I can no longer stand back, sit in the dark and watch harm being done, everyday, all day, to everybody. This is the first post I have ever wrote without going back and reading, before moving forward. I'm not a typist and I can't get this out fast enough. It is 12:30 in the morning and I can feel the adrenaline pumping through me. Of course there is an oil for that, but I can't even get up to get it.<br />
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So, I will now go back to the beginning, where I was flying high about the coffee shop I saw. I had a dream, come to life in the 20 minute drive home. I have already shared it with my best friend, my kids and now here. I will keep some of the vision a surprise, so you can join me on my journey to alleviate harm. I will have a place where mom's can go to find answers, to calm down, to relax. There will not be coffee, yoga, spa treatments, stress of leaving kids at home, pressure, judgement, quick fixes, promises. There will be oils, Ningxia Red, Slique Tea, healthy snacks, and most importantly a place for you to swing by, drop in, with or without kids. This will happen. You will come and you will be forever changed. I have been, and it only took 20 minutes, alone in the car without kids. Just kidding, no quick fixes! I have patience, belief, trust, dreams, no boundaries, no limits, no excuses. Are you ready? Do you want what I have? Do you want to see my dream come to life? Why not! Follow me, encourage me, believe in me, remind me, cheer me on, host a class or party, checkout my website, however, whatever, whenever. I'm just a mom, and I can get side tracked, but I'm not willing to stand by and watch the harm in this toxic place, the patterns, the old stories, the illness and disease to go on. I can make a difference and change. I already have. <br />
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www.ylwebsite.com/cianakellerbalancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-83431655727912353852014-03-02T16:00:00.001-08:002014-03-02T16:00:58.564-08:00Right Where I Should BeI sit here, this rainy Sunday, in a warm, quiet house. I am enjoying where I am right now. All who know me, are aware this could change at any moment. With three kids, ages 12, 9 and 2, the energy and needs are in constant motion and screaming is often involved. We have already been to a basketball game, a birthday party, lunch and a clothing store. My youngest sweetie fell asleep in the car (I love that, easiest baby to transfer). The 12 year old is playing a game next door, and my marvelous middle is have a club meeting in the garage. The sounds of the girls laughing and the washing machine humming, and the smells of my balsam fir in my Young Living diffuser, are amazing. As I sit here, I struggle with all the lists of things I need to do, I walk past the four loads of laundry to fold. I am practicing being present. Actually sitting doing nothing. This is hard in our fast pace world, of hurry up, get it done, must do more, must be the best, etc. I have found when I'm overwhelmed with to do's I just say to myself, "I am doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing." I may have to say it over and over, but it forces me to override the mind chatter and self judgement. When I stop, I am aware of what is most important, my family and the present.balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-36151250627334810842014-02-01T07:49:00.000-08:002014-02-01T07:49:15.766-08:00A Season For NonviolenceAs part of our homeschooling/life schooling adventure, we expose our kids to a variety of curriculum choices and many hands on real life experiences. Developing a successful person is the ultimate goal for all of us. But what is success? Well we may all have a different definition based on our own success or lack of. One common value all must embrace is peace and kindness.<br />
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I have been taking time to develop my spiritual connection to the greater being and through this practice, I was introduced to the 64 ways in 64 Days to commit to for the Season of Nonviolence. I had heard of this a few years ago and didn't pay much attention to it, because I'm not a violent person. When I heard it described this time, the reverend said that we probably think we aren't violent, but violence comes in all forms and causes harm. It could be the tone you are using with someone, the judgement you make, the gossip you engage in. When I heard the tone statement, I thought: guilty. I never thought of it as harmful. Of course I know it doesn't feel good to be yelled at or to be the yeller. So in honor of the anniversaries of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and Mahatma Gandhi, I have made a commitment to be conscious of the way I am everyday, all day.<br />
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Now to the hard part. The first day was Thursday the 30th. The commitment was: "Today, I will reflect on what peace means to me." It wasn't very long after we got up that my 12 year old upset me and I may have yelled. I was upset that I failed the test already. Then I remembered that life gives you do overs, and so I went on. The next day was: "Today, I will look at opportunities to be a peacemaker." The same thing, at some point in the day, I found I was using a tone, that could be harmful. By the evening I was wavering between guilt and failure. How could this simple commitment be hard for me! Then I had a light bulb go on.<br />
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I have been reading and discussing a book by Bruce Lipton, called <u>Biology Of Belief.</u> It is a new science book on the brain and how it works. He claims that we are only conscious 5% of the time. 95% of the time our actions, habits, etc. come from unconscious place. Take a moment to think about how routine you day may be and how you interact with people, often you are in a fog, not having to think. When you are conscious you are completely aware of your tone, your words, your actions, etc. It has taken me a few years to understand and embrace this knowledge. I really saw it in action over the last few days, when I was trying to teach my kids to be aware of their actions and words, in a effort to make a commitment to nonviolence. The gift I have been given, is the awareness when I come from harm. It will go off like an alarm, as soon as it happens. This is not failure, this is a breakthrough. Many folks will not take the time, to look inward at their patterns and scripts that they come from. It's too painful to do self development. As for guilt, I have none, because I'm working on myself, now, before my kids grow up. I'm helping them to become conscious people, whom come from that 5% more and if they can do this, they will be successful. So it is my hope and dream, that I can inspire one person to check themselves. To look up and print out the Season of Nonviolence and become more aware. Lets keep the momentum of these great peacemakers alive. It starts with you, your family, in your home.balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-29471849449888494862014-01-16T00:29:00.000-08:002014-01-16T00:29:08.575-08:00Are You Dancing?Are you dancing? Why not?<br />
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At any moment, at anytime you have an opportunity to dance. Sometimes you will be dancing to a fast, happy song, sometimes a slow, sad song. We all have a song and we should dance.<br />
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When we dance we are usually happy, and if we are not, the moving of our body can change the chemistry. When we are happy, we are usually coming from our heart. When we come from our heart, we return to who we were born as, and we when we are returning to ourselves, we have clarity. So why not dance?<br />
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My intention for 2014 is to show you how to dance. I am not a dancer, I don't see myself as a fabulous dancer, but I like to dance. When I recently had this clarity, I started to share this idea with women, whom I had just met. I was surprised by the responses I was given. Many asked how I was going to do this and if I was a dancer. I replied with the most confidence, I've had in a long time, "We all have a song, it is different than everyone else's. We need to give ourselves permission to follow our hearts and find happiness. To follow our passions and return to ourselves. I believe when we dance, it makes us happy and when we are happy, we have clarity, allowing us to come from our hearts and break away from patterns that may have been set in our life. Find your song and dance! This will create the balance you are looking for in your life." The women then thanked me and shared how they love to dance, but hadn't done so in a long time. I gave them permission to dance. As they walked through a spiritual path of angels, hearing positive affirmations, I whispered, "find your song and dance." Eyes filled with tears, or mouths curved up in smiles, as they recognized my voice or appreciated to reminder to return to themselves.<br />
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As I look back on this spiritual transformation from 2013 to 2014, I have extreme balance. I am happy when I walk by my balance rocks and see that even in the midst of the storm, they have stayed solid and so have I. I find strength in going to my balance alter, with my Young Living Oils and my vision boards, to re-CENTER (see previous post) and gather strength to help me go on. I am reminded what is important to me and what I need to focus on. My family is receiving this gift as I model it and share the tools with them. I am passionate about sharing my tools with other family members, friends, home schoolers, etc. I have been given a gift to share and will continue to shine light on the darkness and inspire others to dance!<br />
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If you would like to host a dance session/balance class in your home, let me know! I am confident you will leave feeling refreshed and have the strength to spread light and love to all that cross your path. If interested in how I use essential oils to heal naturally, prevent and fight off illness or stay emotionally balanced, then see my website: www.ylwebsite.com/cianakeller<br />
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Happy New Year!!balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-88027122503003512832013-08-07T12:06:00.000-07:002013-08-07T12:06:26.343-07:00Embrace the Return to YourselfAs I sit and listen to the night sounds, I feel blessed to have created a space to share thoughts from within. I know I have strayed from the blogging, often wondering if anyone even reads it. But that doesn't matter, because at the end of the day when I'm reflecting, its a nice place to let the thoughts flow. When I am balanced and listening to my heart I have clarity. This is when I feel I must record these thoughts, for thoughts become words and words become actions. Be careful what you think or say, you will get it all.<br />
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I just have returned from a weekend in town at a homeschool conference. I always get jazzed by all the confident speakers. These are usually moms who have older homeschoolers, who have made it, who are successful. I left feeling a sense of pride and honor to be able to have the opportunity to homeschool my three children. I do occasionally long for alone moments, but know at some point there will be many. One of the speakers spoke about this unexpected journey with her family and how she introduced herself as a writer, to a lady she just me. She actually hadn't published anything, but had a passion in her heart to do so. She encouraged us to follow our passions, and dreams and to model that for our children. Its so easy to lose ourselves in the kids and activities, that we don't even know what we want for ourselves. The kids leave and you have nothing, no passion, no purpose, no drive. This can leave the kids feeling responsible for your happiness. So, I sat there and thought about the things I like to do and was excited to get back online and share my perspective on whatever comes up. My passions in life are all related to family, homeschooling, teaching, natural childbirth, natural healing with Young Living essential oils, living balanced lives, community and traditions. My activities and friends overlap in all areas. I am blessed to be able to follow my dreams and share with others how I do it.<br />
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I also spoke at the conference. I laughed at my topic, because I didn't feel very confident at it last week. But instead of getting discouraged I looked at it as a gift, to review all the tools I do have. My workshop was called Finding Balance Within. I shared a tool I use to balance and change energy in my home. How to stay centered and calm in the midst of a storm. I had lavender diffusing and soft relaxation music playing. People entered the room with hope in their eyes, for simple tricks to balance. I went around the room and put Young Living's essential oil blend Balance, on everyone palms. They rubbed the oil in a clockwise motion and then we cupped both hands over our noses. We took long deep breaths, with a five second inhale and a five second exhale. As we practiced a deep meaningful breath the energy in the room went from a low hum, to very tranquil and relaxed. I taught a centering sequence of phrases that you say in your head while inhaling and exhaling. This was successful and amazing to see so many people fully relax and let go. They were open to a new tool and I know many will go share with their family.<br />
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The centering sequence is:<br />
C- come to a complete stop, leave the situation, in order to go center. Say: I am (on the inhale), completely stopping (on the exhale)<br />
E- expect nothing, when you set yourself up with expectations and they don't occur you feel like you failed. Say: I expect (on the inhale), nothing (on the exhale)<br />
N- Name your work, be specific to what you are trying to do at that moment, it maybe just centering, or it maybe more specific like I am trying to get kids in the car. Say: I am doing (on the inhale), my work (on the exhale)<br />
T- trust your resources, the tools you have, the people who support you, this sequence. Say: I trust (on the inhale), my resources (on the exhale)<br />
E- embrace the moment, welcome the power behind centering before taking any further action. Say: I embrace (on the inhale), this moment (on the exhale)<br />
R- return with strength. When you go back to situation you will have more clarity because your frequencies have been raised by the deep cleansing breaths. Say: I return (on the inhale), with strength (on the exhale)<br />
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If you like this sequence, try adding oils to your meditation and centering. You will be a more balanced person. Warning, you may have clarity and find yourself on a path you wandered off, long ago. Embrace the return to yourself!<br />
<br />balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-87697037073015000642013-08-07T11:52:00.001-07:002013-08-07T11:52:19.325-07:00A Balanced Life: Embrace the Return to Yourself<a href="http://balancedlife-balancedmomma.blogspot.com/2013/08/embrace-return-to-yourself.html?spref=bl">A Balanced Life: Embrace the Return to Yourself</a>: As I sit and listen to the night sounds, I feel blessed to have created a space to share thoughts from within. I know I have strayed from th...balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-75414509038871417642012-08-04T00:07:00.002-07:002012-08-04T00:07:19.315-07:00How I RechargeWow, what a wonderful day!! I had the opportunity to attend my 5th HSC homeschool conference. It is held here in Sacramento, so it's close and convenient. While some families choose to bring their children and even grandparents, I use this weekend as my get away. I enjoy going to lectures and workshops. It feeds my soul and reminds me that I am a part of a huge movement, homeschooling. It is now mainstream! I was inspired today in many ways and I would love to sum it up here. There are many workshops to choose from, but I quickly realized that my theme was self care and happiness. Every lecture or even conversations I had, wove together in such a beautiful way.<br />
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The first talk was called, "The New Consciousness of Education." It was presented by a public school math teacher, who is a homeschool dad of four. That alone should be an eye opener, but I am not shocked! Especially after spending many years going to public school and teaching in it! He was going over his theory on why there are so many issues in schools. He said, "You can't change things from the outside, you must evoke change from the inside." He asked us what most people think success is? What is happiness? Most agreed that they were all told the same lie growing up, that is you get good grades in school, you will go to a good college, get a good job, make good money and be successful and happy! This lie suggests that there is one path to success and if you don't follow it, you will not be happy!! Of course as homeschoolers, we think the opposite, there are many paths and we are here to help our children follow their passions. He suggested we think about success differently. He went on to explain things that most people crave and need to function happily. Choice, we all want choices. If your child says no, they are probably saying I want choice. I was shocked when he put up these pictures of prisons and said, we strip away all the rights to choose. They can't choose where to go, what to eat or when, whether to talk or not, when or where to sleep or exercise, when to go to the bathroom, what to wear, etc. What surprised me was when he compared that list to school, so true! I remember teaching, no lie! The pictures he had up there were actually schools that looked like prisons! He also talked about the human need for connection. He reviewed how times have changed and how people long for connection and try to get it via Facebook, reality tv, video games. These are all creating more separation. We all need a healthy way to connect with others. Where are you connected? Disconnection leads to depression. The last thing I took away from his talk was to let your children have curiosity, then cultivate it, this will lead to competence and build their confidence. This is what he called the cycle of cultivation.<br />
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The next lecture was by a great gal, named Sandra Dodd. She is an unschooler and is very entertaining. She speaks the truth and says things most people think but wont say out loud. Her talk was titled, "Happiness from the Inside out." She spoke about simple tools that I have been working on for years, but it was nice to hear it in a funny, light way. Laughter is a great stress reliever! She said your environment should provide emotional safety and peace for your children. So if you find yourself going down a negative path that will be contagious. You have a choice to be positive, to look for the good in all situations, and it maybe hard. It takes practice and awareness. It is possible to nurture and encourage people to be happy. She spoke about joy and wonder and to not accept a prepackaged life. That you can find more time to be present and look for gratitude. She reminded us how negative the news and media is and how it can affect the way you feel. She asked us to think about the people or activities or the things we watch and if they add improvement to your life? Are you getting caught up in other peoples drama and allowing it to bring pollution into your life? She ended with a funny quote that she found added laughter in her home, so she posted it in her bathroom. " A fart is a wish your butt makes."(Sorry, I couldn't stop laughing, had to share!)<br />
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The last worksop I went to was called, "Homeschool Burnout."I had no idea what to expect and as I walked in late I was surprised to see magazines all over the floor and people ripping pictures out. I was instantly intrigued. She greeted me and filled me in on the activity. We were doing a dream book or mini vision book for our homeschool. A great way to reconnect with what is important and refocus in times of need. The first thing I did was write my mission statement for our homeschool. I had to let go of it not being perfect and just let it flow. This is what I wrote, "It is our mission to have a peaceful, loving home. In our home our children will be able to explore their passions. They will be allowed to follow their inner spirit. They will experience support in all they do. We will cherish our time together, especially in times of transition with daddy traveling." The next page was reasons we homeschool. I wrote, "To allow children to learn when they are ready. Follow where they are developmentally, not the state standards. Spend time in a safe environment. Spend time with daddy when he is here or travel with him. Accept them as who they are. Raise happy, healthy children." We then found pictures in magazines to remind us of our dreams for us individually, not for our kids or family. We wrote a statement or mantra on the cover of booklet, to bring us back to why we chose this journey. I found a picture of these cartoon heads with baseball hats on. It said, "Get your game face on." What an appropriate saying for this professional baseball family!<br />
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I am looking forward to the rest of the weekend. There are some more great topics and I hope I leave feeling as energized as I do now!!balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-87663776139425716932012-08-01T23:21:00.000-07:002012-08-01T23:21:25.755-07:00What Does The Chaos Mean?It hit me last Thursday, that I am pretty much a single parent more than 75% of the year! Then the next question I freaked out about was, how am I going to do this all alone, especially the teenagers?! My husband works January through October, everyday, all day. He travels all over the US and is on a different time zone most of the time. When people hear he watches baseball for a living they must think, what a great job. I wonder if anyone knows what it's really like.<br />
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Up until recently, I did a pretty good job of keeping the kids connected and distracted while he was gone. They go through different phases of being sad and mad. The new emotion is anger. I guess we grieve when he's gone and when he comes home we adjust or act out when we know he'll be leaving again. I know he thinks I'm pretty lucky, getting to be in the same bed nightly, real home cooked food, hanging out with my kids. Don't get me wrong, I do feel fortunate!<br />
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I have been home from work for 11 years!! Over the years I have been able to explore myself and follow my passions. I started homeschooling when my son was 18 months old. I started teaching natural childbirth when he was 2 and became a natural healer when he was 7. Wow how lucky can I be to not have to worry about work and just focus on my family! Well, with all that comes a down side. No break for mom!! This might be ok if my husband came home nightly or even on the weekends. But there could be months at a time where I don't know where he is and when he's coming home. Of course I chose to live in Sacramento to be close to my parents and brother, so I could use their help. They do help quite a bit, but when the chaos appears and daddy is gone, it is me. One strong, patient, well experienced, bachelors in child development (so I should know how to handle anything) mother! I'm trying my best.<br />
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Lately it has been interesting the dynamics around here with a new 11 year old boy, who misses his daddy and all his old neighbor playmates. The 8 year old girl has her qualities, that I'd love to trade in when I'm tired. Which with a nursing 1 year old, tired is my middle name. So, as the glass bottle broke on the floor, sending all kids scrambling to clean up, I had to ask myself, "How am I going to handle a 1 year old camping?" I quickly shot a text off to three people. My husband said, "we would handle her together." My sister said, "this too shall pass." Boy that sounded good when I said it to her, but not sure how it helps me now! My friend, who is also going camping, said, "alcohol." Funny that is close to what my friend said last week, when I wept by the pool, over a 11 year old whom wasn't listening! (She said margarita's.)<br />
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So, I come back to my question, what does the chaos mean? There is definitely a message or lesson to be heard and learned. Slow down, spend time, listen, simplify, expand your village, find your rhythm, love your children, take an om card, have faith. When I drove off with all three in tow, I ran into a used kids store and bought a backpack style carrier, to hold the 1 year old when camping. I then headed up the hill to my cousins, listening to classical music, which forced the kids to be quiet and probably go inward. We enjoyed family, swimming, food and nature. Not many discipline issues especially when all are happy and relaxed. We got home and I tucked my 11 year old in, applied his favorite essential oils, and had our 11 kisses and 1 to grow on. He stopped me and said sorry for his poor behavior. We sealed the apology with 12 kisses again, and I felt better. I got another call from the 8 year old, saying sorry and sealed that apology with 9 kisses. I love them. Maybe this transition from our old home, filled with great neighbors, was a gift. We are no longer distracted from our family getting to know each other. Wow, what a powerful thought. Family is important, kids are the future, care for them tenderly. When the weeds of doubt come up, look for the wildflowers. This too shall pass.balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-12416012736385105462012-05-03T00:21:00.001-07:002012-05-03T00:21:16.053-07:00May Day BlessingsWell as I come to the end of a very long day, I'm inspired to write about this years May Day. We celebrated the Spring time tradition with at least 50 other home schoolers at a local park, filled with trees, flowers, birds and butterflies. All came and gathered around the May pole celebrating the arrival of spring, the fruits of our land, the circle of life. I became emotional seeing the new May queen, whom was pregnant. It reminded me of last year, when I was near the end of my pregnancy with Jenna. I had no idea when I walked in front of all, that I would be birthing a few days later. I remember the love I felt and how perfect the day seemed. The weaving of the pole was flawless, the songs were in perfect harmony, the children's performances were meaningful.<br />
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This year represented a different energy, one of transition and newness, many new people, new leaders, less days to prepare due to mother nature. As I sat back and enjoyed the scene, I had to laugh at the chaos around the pole as the older children struggled to weave over and under, as the adults strained to sing the songs not practiced before. I saw my children looking frustrated but they kept going, even though they had no idea which step was next. What a mirror of our real life, try to stay calm, go with the flow, help if you can, etc.<br />
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Wow, how life has changed with a third baby! We are on the go constantly so, she hardly gets a regular nap. She is a walker now, so we have to keep close eye on her to ensure she is safe. So, we don't get as much sitting down school work done. Our priorities have changed. We are enjoying our life together and making every moment count. We are learning to help each other in all areas, house work, yard work, school work, party planning, etc. Daddy still travels a lot, so we make an effort to send pictures daily, to keep him connected. We call and give play by plays during my son, Cade's, ball games. We do loud phone kisses, and kiss the baby on her head just like daddy!<br />
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As we ended the May pole and shared delicious food, I was amazed by what this group has become. For the most part the people all want the same things. A place to go, that is safe and loving. A place where the kids can be themselves. A place where parents can get support for school and parenting. The children look forward to seeing there friends, playing sports, climbing trees, exploring the river, catching bugs and playing house.<br />
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So, we are headed into a special weekend for Jenna. She is turning one! We will celebrate with family and close friends. Blessing Jenna for joining our family and sharing our wishes for her. We will also share our love for life. What a beautiful place we are in, with the love and energy to create all we want and all we have.balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-13297115397293203222012-02-10T07:29:00.000-08:002012-02-10T07:53:47.952-08:00Powerful PeppermintI have been using Young Living Essential Oils for about 4 years! I can't imagine my life without them. I have always been into natural remedies and try to avoid over the counter meds. if at all possible. I have had 3 natural births and been teaching childbirth for 10 years. I am a homeschooling mom, surrounded by Waldorf inspired teachers, whom all heal naturally. I found a anthroposopic pediatrician who believes in the mind and body connection. He spends at least 1/2 hour with each child. I feel fortunate to be able to explore this world of essential oils and to share my experiences with friends. I don't know anyone who wouldn't benefit from using these. On a day to day basis we all have some aliment that we probably take something for or at least want to. From waking up (caffeine) to headache or body aches ( pain killer). This is how I use Peppermint everyday!!! I try to get up at 6:30 a.m. to do my stretches and meditation. This may only last 10 minutes but it is worth it! I put 1-2 drops of peppermint in my hand and then put a quarter size amount of v-6 (carrier oil, like vegetable oil) in my hand. I rub vigorously together, then bring to my nose and take 3 deep breaths in. I then cover one nostril and take a few short breaths in, repeat on the other side. I then massage my face with the peppermint/v-6, rubbing my jaw (sore from clenching, leading to headache), rub my ears to help open up if closed, continuing down my neck, massaging sore muscles (from nursing a baby all night), then rub my tummy to help with digestion. I may also take a drop in my mouth for fresh breath! This process wakes me up and gets me going for the day! How many products can you use daily on many parts and use on your kids or pets, without side effects?balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-21819421785487508442012-02-02T23:12:00.000-08:002012-02-02T23:33:04.597-08:00What Makes Me Happy?<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>When I stop and think about what makes me happy, I come to the word order. I almost cringe at the word, when you think of it from a ego perspective. What I really mean is I want harmony, in the way we see it in nature. Where everything has a place and perfection, in order for the things to flow the way they are supposed to. I like to have a routine and schedule to look at. The things to do list, to check off, makes me smile. I like to meal plan weekly, so at 4 o'clock I know what we are having. I like to have a balance of home time, class time, friend time and me time. I enjoy getting up before everyone else, so I can breathe, stretch, do some yoga poses and meditate, even if only for a few minutes. I love holidays and parties. I enjoy hosting events where I can bring joy to others! I like peace. I like when my kids are playing together and being creative. I really love when they make up games to play. At 7 and 10, that is amazing! To be a kid for as long as possible, what a treat. <div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>As a mom I usually come last. That doesn't make sense, because if momma isn't happy, nobody is! So, as my husband heads off for another baseball season, I sit and try to process, what makes me happy? How will I handle the daily stress of three kids, homeschooling, running a home, all while my husband is gone? I made a list on my new phone and am trying to line up another grandparent day, a yoga class, etc. I have a saying, I used to say all the time when I taught in the classroom, "prevention is the key." This goes beyond school, it is a good life tool. I have been looking ahead to the season of single mom time and have decided to prevent mom meltdown. If I implement help from the village, I should be less lonely and stressed. So my homework is, when someone asks something of me, I will ask myself, "what do I need first?" I can help others, only after I have given myself the first minute, not the last. Move at my pace, help myself, so I am able to meet the needs of others. What a new way of life for me! </div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-64026820181631615472011-05-05T07:38:00.000-07:002011-05-05T07:53:54.105-07:00May Day BlessingsWe celebrated May Day yesterday. We have been fortunate enough to find a group of home schoolers whom gather once a week at Ancil Hoffman Park. It is a beautiful setting near the river. There are no play structures or guided activities, which fosters group games and creative play. We celebrate many seasonal holidays, seen in the Waldorf schools. Yesterday about 50 people gathered around the May pole as the procession started. I was named the May Day queen and came in throwing rose petals. My children were a part of the procession, Cade playing the hand drum and Josie playing the maraca. We welcomed all and I shared a Spring poem. The day continued with other performances consisting of music, poems and jokes. Then the weaving began. The little fairy kids went round the pole to music. The older children had practiced weaving some going over, some under, ending in an intricate weave pattern round the pole. We stood around the pole, blessed our food and friends and had a delicious potluck. <div><br /></div><div>I enjoyed the moments I had with my kids. It is special to enjoy the little things, like Cade rubbing the baby, kissing and saying I love you baby. I also enjoyed my little Josie trying to get me dressed for the job of the queen. She found the perfect dress for her and I. We shared the bathroom mirror to add the finishing touches. I watched Cade capture the special scenes on the camera. He also spent time with one of the youngest members, Mason, 8 months. Josie was a great momma to her newborn doll, Cambria. </div><div><br /></div><div>It was a lovely Spring day! We ended by taking my parents to dinner and celebrating the time we have with them. The children ended the night with some musical performances for Papa. I went to bed at peace with where I am for now. I look forward to the birth of this third baby.</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-1537921720342638352011-04-28T07:08:00.000-07:002011-04-28T08:11:19.996-07:00Trying To BalanceWell it's been about a month since I've last posted and who knows what time I'll have after the baby comes mid May. I am really going to make an effort to try and keep some balance in my life, even with a newborn. I was inspired to look back at a post awhile ago about BALANCE. It has some great tips on how to create a routine to bring balance in your life. It is also a eye opener to what areas maybe affecting you and creating some unsettled feelings. <div><br /></div><div>Since March 13 th, the kids and I have been living at my parents house. This is the house I grew up in, the neighborhood I went to school in, the place we had kids over, the party home, etc. It is also the place my parents have opened to many in the family when they are trying to find their way. There have been a few cousins, aunts, nephews, friends, that have lived here. This is also the place my parents brought my little grandma to stay when she could no longer live alone. She stayed and then went to a care home, then returned to die in a more private setting. </div><div><br /></div><div>My husband has been on the road since the end of February. He comes and goes for 4 day trips to 20 days, coming home for 4 or 5. It is constantly changing and the transition is often rough. We are fortunate he has a good job and the promotion he got this year has taken some stress off his plate. He has been working extra hard tying to get ahead, so he can take a few weeks around the birth. This will be a treat. The last two births he flew in from Washington and Florida and had to leave a few days after the births. I look forward to having him bond with our baby from the start, not months later. With him gone so much I have developed a survival tool for having to do it all. Now that I am at my parents home, I have more help. It is often hard to ask for specific things, because I am used to doing it. I also don't want to assume they are willing to do anything at anytime. We also have different ways of dealing with the children. Just as a mom and dad do things differently, now we have two other ways. It can be challenging to try and help kids understand the different dynamics of a family. The nice thing about being with my family is the meal time, we eat together every night. My mom usually cooks and my dad cleans up. This has been a life saver on my body and mind, as I approach the due date. </div><div><br /></div><div>We sold our home and have been looking for a new one to buy. As I get closer to the birth, I realize we will not have a new home before the birth. I have planned a home birth and now have to change my plan from my own private space, to the space of my family's. For the last 6 years, every time I thought about another baby, I imagined a home birth. I have been teaching natural childbirth classes in my home for 9 years. The more I learn about the business side of birth and the intervention cycle that is hard to escape in the hospital, the more drawn I was to a home birth. I had pictured my living room, with a birth tub, candles, music, my husband and kids. Well, I no longer live in that home. My mom has been gracious enough to offer her room for the birth. It is the only space that is somewhat private. We can retreat to the room, have a bathroom and access to the outdoors. Now the challenge is to let go of the vision I had and create a new one. When you have a home birth it feels safer, more private, more comfortable. These are especially true when you make the space represent the energy you need for a calm birth. As with every person, every room has a different feel. What maybe calm for one, may feel overwhelming or cluttered to another. As I approach the time that I will birth I need to feel I have created the best nest I can for this baby. This is such a different time in my life, where I feel it is a blessing to have this baby join our family. I want to have a quiet space with different elements from each direction. The children and I have been out selecting items, such as shells, eggs, birds, chimes, fruit, and candles in different colors. I hope to set up a birth alter to have something to focus on, to draw strength from. If I can do this then I can have balance. The area is a huge factor in how you relax and surrender to the labor. There needs to be a focus on physical, mental and emotional relaxation. These can be achieved, I managed in a hectic hospital setting, because I had many hours to adjust. I got through a fast labor in a birth center. I look forward to a wonderful home birth, with my family supporting us in the way we seem best at the time. </div><div><br /></div><div>So as you read my adventure, please take time to review your life and ask yourself how can you balance more? Look back at the BALANCE post and try and implement just one area. What are you doing daily for your body? What does the area around you look like? Are you surrounded with things and people you love? Are you being loving to others? What aromas do you use to help create calmness? Are you focused on the now? Are you trying to be present? Do you know how to center in the midst of the storm? Where do you go to take a deep breath and refocus? Are you willing to stop living the same old story and replaying the same old habits in order to embrace the ways to balance that I have presented? If you are feeling weak in any of these areas, it is time, now, with the energy of Spring, to move forward and change. I have faith that if we all try and live a more conscious life we can make this world a more peaceful place to be.</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-71763647892284485172011-03-29T08:15:00.000-07:002011-03-29T10:23:51.818-07:00Party in a Cool Box<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>Over the years we have had many parties in our home, yard, street and garage. So, as we got ready to move, we ordered a Cool Box storage unit. It arrived at our home on a holiday, so all the kids on the street were out of school. The box was insulated and unpacked and the kids said, "can we dance in there?" I thought, no, we have to get packing. Then I stopped and realized we needed to make part of this moving fun. So I said, "one dance." They grabbed their friends, the boom box, their hip hop dance CD, and had an instant party in a box! There were about 10 kids in a 20 foot box. They needed no decorations, fancy lights, nothing, just a place and music! They wound up dancing for about 45 minutes, break dancing moves and routines were being taught. I haven't laughed so hard! I called the mom's to come see the kids. Seeing the kids and their creativity gave me and idea. One of the other mom's and I have had a Halloween party every year and transformed the garage. We would take a few days to push our stuff to the side, hang black plastic and lights. After I saw how much fun they had, I thought we could just rent one of these boxes and we'd have an instant party!! <div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>It is amazing how dancing can lighten the mood and make you feel good. I often will turn on music while cleaning the house. It sure makes the job go faster. My sister and I used to turn on a record from the movie Annie. We would dance and clean to "It's a Hard Knock Life." So as you go through your day, I hope you dance!<div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span> </div></div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-26000429081277508562011-03-27T07:11:00.000-07:002011-03-27T08:29:33.521-07:00Going to Ireland<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>I've never traveled to Europe, but I have been to many new cities across the U.S. I have been on this world win trip recently, that has kept me so busy I haven't had an ounce of energy or time to write. Oh, did I mention I'm 8 months pregnant? So, I am back and hope that as I get back to my routine I can write about some adventures my family has had in the past 2 months!<div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>So, we put our house on the market in the end of January, had an offer in a week! Great, now what? Well, we really wanted to finish the process of selling before we bought another home. Meanwhile my husband was getting ready to leave for work the end of February. So, the whole month we spent packing our 10 years of stuff in a portable storage unit. We had done a lot of decluttering through the staging process and there was a lot in the garage. That was the easy part to pack. Well, actually I did get a little nervous every time I'd hear a new click of the plastic bins. I thought when will I see my stuff again? So with a lot of help from my parents, husband and old friend we did it, packed a 20 ft. unit. Now it was the end of February, James left for Arizona for a month and I still had to pack the house. We thought we needed to be out on the 16 th of March, so we lined up friends and family to come pack another unit on the 13 th. I was having a hard time deciding what to take with me and the kids to my parents house. Yes, my parents have been gracious enough to put us up until we find a new home. After all daddy is traveling and this would help the kids through the transition. </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>My friend and I were talking one morning, because I was overwhelmed with the process of packing clothes, school materials, toys, etc. What would I need over the next few months? She said, it's like you're going on a trip to Europe and you are going to pack just the essentials. A couple jeans, shorts, dresses, shoes, etc. For some reason I loved this analogy and thought about all the traveling I had done and how I couldn't bring everything I owned. I changed my perspective on the situation and started packing. Along with traveling you have to be flexible and go with the flow, act like the locals do. </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>On March 13 th we had my mom, brother, two neighbor couples, my father in law, a good friend, and a lot of kids. Every one came to pack us and send us off on our trip. I decided I've always wanted to go to Ireland and since it was almost St. Patrick's Day, we could learn about the culture there and have fun along the way. I started talking to the kids about our trip and how much fun it would be, how we wouldn't have all our toys and we would miss our friends. They weren't sure about this imaginary trip, but took it in stride. They loved when a small plastic leprechaun came to visit and stared doing tricks on us. He would hide among the boxes and hide gold candy to share.</div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>We arrived in Ireland late on the 13 th. Our room was packed with our suitcases and we had a hard time adjusting to the new sights, sounds, and the time change :). We were so exhausted from the previous weeks that we could hardly see the positives of being here with my family, surrounded by love and support. As with any trip, you meet people along the way that bring light to your life and help you get acclimated. My brother came and took my son Cade on a night out, which really helped as he missed daddy and his friends. We spent the next week trying to finish house paperwork. This took over our nights and days until the 22 nd, when it finally closed! </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>Every time we got caught in the blues we would try to stop and enjoy the ride. The transition is hard. We had been in the same house for 10 years. The kids had great friends and constant play dates. We are grieving the loss of the old ways. Every time you go through a big life change, you grieve. The first step is anger. My son definitely exhibiting signs of this on Monday. I had a hard time trying to calm him. I too was sad and disappointed, that this was not going the way I had envisioned it. I thought, we would sell, maybe rent back, then move to our new home. When am I going to learn you can't plan it all? </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>I have finally tried to get up at 6:30 to do my stretches, yoga, and mediation. One morning I thought about the transition and how it was our routine, it was our schooling, it was what we were doing and had to surrender to the now. I saw the correlation between labor and now. In labor you go through three different stages. You learn to relax physically, mentally and emotionally. When you get to transition, you feel like your contractions are coming on on top of the other, you may feel crabby, sick, etc. You often feel you can't go on and this is often when people ask for drugs to ease the pain. Of course when you understand the process and know that transition is the shortest part of labor, you can manage the pain. The tools you were using before may not work the same, but knowing it will be over helps you surrender to the process. The more you fight it, the more painful it will be. So here I am in transition. I can't control my emotions, feel a little un productive and having a hard time relaxing through the process. As soon as I saw the correlation, I realized I needed to surrender. I am now trying to enjoy the moment, go with the flow, let the kids lead the day and follow their interests. </div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>I have also found these wonderful speakers whom are helping remind me to be present. I know all these things, but sometimes it is hard to stay calm in the midst of the storm. The daily affirmations, the focusing on the simple things and the gratitude's, do help. I hope as you read the next few weeks, you'll see the shift or reminders in how to enjoy the ride, the vacation, the trip. This trip isn't what I expected, but what trip is? You never know exactly what people you will meet, what food you will like or what events will be going on? Take it one day at a time, or if it's real tough, one hour at a time. You too can get through transition. </div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-56561999739612537312011-01-11T07:15:00.000-08:002011-01-11T08:21:11.635-08:00What Would Love Do?I was motivated last weekend to go back the The Spiritual Life Center, where all are welcomed. It was the New Years weekend and all were filled with hope and joy for the upcoming year. There were two speakers who addressed the opportunity for change. I love sitting with an open mind, taking notes and enjoying the positive energy. The first women spoke about being present. She said we are all so blessed in everyday, that we need to spend our time focusing on what we do have, not what we don't. I already believe this and make a conscious effort to do this daily. She talked about love and how powerful it is. She challenged us to use love in times that the answers weren't that clear. To follow your gut and come from love. So when you are in a situation and you don't know how to handle it, ask yourself, "what would love do?" For some reason this statement resonated with me and I have implemented it all week long. My husband also thought this was a positive saying to incorporate into our home. He said that I could remind him by saying it to him. <div><br /></div><div>So what does this look like? Our daughter is having a hard time handling the answer, NO. Sounds like every kid! She has a fit and we are in the process of figuring out what the best plan is. Now, the frustrated parent would yell and say that is the answer! But, if you stop and ask yourself, what would love do? You would stop and listen to her and come from love, still standing your ground. I remember my mom used to say, when all else fails give them a hug. This goes well with love. It takes patience and concentration to stop your old habits. You must want to create a loving environment, to have one.<div><br /></div><div>Yesterday was a challenging day. We had school work to finish to turn into our home school advisor. We had to eat lunch and be ready to turn in the work. We are also getting ready to put our home on the market, so keeping everything neat and tidy with two kids is a daily challenge. Meanwhile my son was feeling the beginning signs of a cold and he was having a hard time focusing. I was grateful that he was home and not having to try to focus in a classroom. The advisor came and the kids played with her 3 daughters for 2 hours. It was a great visit and we were ready for our afternoon. It was getting cold and I had to say no to playing and deal with 2 melt downs. I decided to go off and run an errand, hoping that my husband would be able to handle 2 crying kids with love. When I returned the energy was the same, a bit chaotic and upsetting. After dinner as we sat around the table, I asked myself, what would love do? </div><div><br /></div><div>I called a family meeting. The rules were that one person spoke at a time, and you could say anything you feel, anything that is bothering you. This was going to be the challenge for my husband and I not to want to teach a lesson in the middle. My son started by saying he is frustrated when his sister cries. She had to take a deep breath and not get mad when he was speaking. There were a few concerns stated about her and I, as the moderator, had to intervene to be sure this wasn't going to be a gang up on one person circle. The intention was that you could feel safe to share and we would all listen without judging. When my 6 year old spoke she said, she has days when she feels off. She gets upset and doesn't like to, but she doesn't like not getting her way. People had chances to respond, in a loving way. Of course we needed lots of reminders, even for my husband not to turn it into a lecture. We sat for a good 20 minutes, which was longer that I had expected. We restated the rules of the house, our routines for morning, school and evening. My daughter finally raised her hand and said can we be excused? We continued our evening in a calmer more loving fashion. There was less yelling and more feelings being shared. All helped clear the table, do dishes and play a game. It is exhausting to constantly stop and come from love, but it is really damaging to come from the opposite place. Whoever said life, parenting, marriage, etc. would be easy? </div><div><br /></div><div>As we head into this New Year, ask yourself daily, "What would love do?" You will be surprised, the answer is always there. It feels good. You can do it. You can train your brain to form new cell assemblies. You don't have to stay stuck in your old patterns. You don't have to make up excuses and blame your childhood for the ways you are now. You can make a conscious effort to bring positive change into your daily life. It takes one statement, one minute to stop. If this is overwhelming, reread my centering and balance posts. This is nothing new to me, just a different looking tool. What would love do? Take the time to stop and think. </div></div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-879945515918354112010-12-27T06:56:00.000-08:002010-12-27T08:00:53.221-08:00We Are The LightAs I sit here reflecting on the Christmas holiday, I am overcome with joy and sadness. I have always wanted to create community. So wherever I am, I make sure all are introduced and try and find common ground amongst strangers, so they can have a conversation. I am constantly organizing gatherings of friends or the neighbor kids to build relationships. It is my calling. So as my family begins this transition from our neighborhood, to another one, I am sad. We know it is the right time for us to move. We need to find a space we feel good in. A space for all of us, to live, home school, play, relax, work, etc. We have cultivated many friendships on this street. We know we are lucky and that it is rare that neighbors even talk. Many people are so rushed and self centered that they pull right into their garage and never say hi. When we are running around we still greet our neighbors. I feel it is more important than rushing off to our location. <div><br /></div><div>So after five years of the Community Christmas tree, we finally decided to do something new. I have seen my parents street light luminary bags all the way down the street on Christmas Eve. It was always so beautiful. I really wanted to do this and told a few neighbors we would. So I bought white lunch bags, tea light candles and kitty litter. At about 3 p.m. a few families headed out with wagons in tow, to line to luminaries all in a row. The kids took turns pouring kitty litter in the bags and placing a candle in the bag. We lined the street with 160 bags. People were slowing down and asking what we were doing and when we would light them? We invited all to come out and see the magic at 6 p.m. When we at started the lighting, a few neighbors came out to help and in about 10 minutes, all the candles were lit. It was breath taking! Absolutely amazing! There were about 12 families that came out in ahhh. We stood around visiting, sharing hot chocolate and Christmas plans. while admiring the simple gesture of lights. Some neighbors reintroduced themselves and others shared fun memories. </div><div><br /></div><div>The bags stayed lit for quite awhile. As I hustled around, setting up for Christmas morning, I kept glancing out the window at the lights. I felt so good to see the lights and how happy the people were. The last time I glanced most of the lights were out. It was about 10:30. There was one light right in front of our house. I got chills. I said to my husband, "honey, you know what that means?" He said, "yes, we are the light." I said, "yes we are." Then he said, "you are the light." </div><div><br /></div><div>As we woke up the next morning and saw the bags lining the street it still had a sense of beauty. We were so busy with the kids and family we didn't have time to pick up the bags. We planned on doing it Sunday morning, but it had rained so, the clean up would require a large garbage being rolled up and down the street, with a shovel. My husband left to run an errand and the bags were still there. When he returned the bags were gone. Some good neighbor had done a good deed and cleaned the street. What a surprise. We were left to wonder who had been the angel. We had to except the love we received by giving the light to others.</div><div><br /></div><div> When we first looked at this house, a neighbor in her seventies, came out and handed me oranges, because I was pregnant with my first. She was the light on the street. She would wave to all, greet them and come to a fast halt in her car, just to get involved in a conversation. She loved the gatherings we created, especially the community Christmas tree. She would buy all the kids on the street Advent calenders and gave treats to all who stopped buy. She passed away, suddenly 2 years ago, November. All were shocked and completely saddened. That year we bought a giant icicle star, to put on the 15 ft. tree out front. It was for Inge. She was there in spirit. This year I took that star and put it on our inside family tree. It matched my snowflake theme. The star shines so bright. Her house is still in the family and her son dropped by Sunday afternoon with a gift. I opened the card and it said, "The holidays aren't always easy, but with the glow of every candle and the twinkle of every Christmas star, may happy memories warm your heart and light the way to a perfect season and hope filled New Year." He then added, "thank you for bringing so much sunshine to my mothers life!" I opened the package and there was one of her Hummels, a fine collectible figure of a boy and girl, made in Germany. She had quite the collection. My heart melted and I was later brought to tears when I shared it with my husband.</div><div><br /></div><div>So as the season comes to a close and you are reflecting, ask yourself what can you do to be the light in someone else's life? Imagine if everyone did this? What a kind world we would live in?How joyous and peaceful it would be. Be the light. It doesn't have to be a big gesture, it could just be a smile or a hello. Happy Holidays!</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-7342877648028792212010-12-08T07:09:00.000-08:002010-12-08T08:33:29.034-08:00Lifting the Spirits of OthersWe live in a old established neighborhood. We have been here for 10 years. My husband and I have worked hard to create community with our neighbors. We greet people as they walk by, we wave to cars, we visit with neighbors. We have held monthly dinners, block parties, Halloween parties, bike parades, book drives, toy drives, collected for stone soup projects, hunted for the Leprechaun's gold, held cookie making parties, everyday play dates on the lawn, Lego club days, etc. As you can tell we have created a good thing. <div><br /></div><div>In 2005, my husband decided to get a 15 foot tree and temporarily plant in in the front yard for Christmas. We sent out invitations to all the neighbor's to come to the first annual community Christmas tree. We asked all to bring an ornament to decorate, a dish to share and toy to donate. It was a huge hit! We had 100 people on the front lawn. They were eating, drinking, laughing, decorating the tree, taking family photos in front of the tree, meeting new neighbors and reconnecting with old. When it was almost time to light the tree, the local fire station would come and show the kids the truck, pass out stickers and hats, then collect the toys. We always had a big countdown to light the tree. It was such a beautiful sight to see the tree lighting up the street. This party went annually for 5 years!</div><div><br /></div><div>We would take the neighbor kids out to a local tree farm, choose the biggest tree we could handle and cut it down. Then came the dragging it to the truck and hoisting it up. Once we got home we would dig a 3-4 ft. hole in lawn to lower the trunk into and stake it down. We would have big hay bales around it to act as support and were great seats at the party. We would gather tables from the neighbors to set up an elaborate potluck of appetizers, crock pots, desserts and even a chocolate fountain. We had a fire pit that kept many warm, long after the crowd had died down. The party would start around 3 and often go till at least 9! The kids loved the tradition of going to the farm, riding around in the old Ford truck, drinking hot cocoa and eating donuts. The best part was being able to party and play outside with their friends in the dark. As the years went on, the neighbors would come and go and outsiders were invited in, to share the good spirit of the street. We were real proud of how a simple tree could bring people together. </div><div><br /></div><div>In 2009, things changed and we held our last tree party. We went out to the tree farm without any help from friends, and cut down the biggest tree we had yet. Four adults and one kid pulled with all our might to get that tree in the truck. My 5 year old just laid on the ground and laughed at how we were barely moving and inch. A worker, who was smaller then me, came over to help, and some how we got it in the truck. I know there was some help from the angels that day! When we got home, the guys on the street helped put it in the ground. As I got ready for the party there was one neighbor who saw we could use some help. He stayed all day and decorated the tree. It was amazing to see his love and dedication. He really took pride in what he was doing. It was the best tree we had yet! Another angel sent to me that day. The party went on, it wasn't the biggest, maybe 50 people. I had some moments in the party that I noticed change in the neighborhood. Some people didn't come, others stayed in and peered out instead of joining. It was fun for those who came, but I had a bit of sadness that times were changing and that this would be my final year of hosting.</div><div><br /></div><div>This all leads to this year, 2010. I didn't host the Halloween party and the kids were still upset about that, then they quickly realized, we may not have the tree party. My 9 year old, said, "mom you can't drop all of our traditions!" So, after much debate and some grieving at the passing of a tradition, we decided to have a block decorating party. A day for neighbors to come out decorate their homes, visit with others, share some snacks and hot drinks. We thought we would buy red bows to hang on all the trees on the street. We also looked up some different charities and decided to go ahead and hold a toy drive. Our home was the gathering place to drop off toys, donate money for the bows and share a snack. As we returned from the tree farm at 12:15, I rushed to the store to be back by 1 for a gathering that I was looking forward to. It was simple, no stress and different. A way to gather people and share the holiday spirit. I quickly realized that many people probably hardly read the invite and assumed it was the same old tree party. They started to come with big platters of food, I scrambled for plates and silverware. They brought hot drinks and needed cups. Then came the rain, we all quickly pushed the tables into the garage and porch and tried to stay dry. This didn't stop the kids from playing, building forts, swinging on the rope swing, eating cookies, shooting baskets and staying warm by the fire. It was a disappointment to others when they found out we weren't doing the tree or the fire fighters weren't coming.</div><div><br /></div><div>I felt sad about the change, but knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. I have been trying to gently prepare our neighbors for the future. We are having a baby and need more room for my homeschooling and my husbands office. We have had so much fun in our 10 years here and have made some great friends. We know we can create this type of community wherever we are. As I walk down the street or even take a quick glance, I see the red bows, and it is really pretty! A simple way to remind others that we care and appreciate them as a part of our unique community. I realized this is missing in many neighborhoods. As I was buying 60 bows at the dollar store, the gal ringing me up said, "what do you need all the bows for?" I said, "we are decorating the street, by hanging the bows on all the big trees." She looked at me and said, "Why?" I was shocked, and saddened that she didn't get the point. Greet your neighbors. This is the only life you have here, enjoy it to the fullest, make it special and memorable, even if you don't have kids, you are worth it and so are others. Happy Holidays!</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-46227114309379920232010-11-26T07:25:00.000-08:002010-11-26T08:13:46.082-08:00The Day AfterAs I sit here looking at the pile of sale ads, dishes from Thanksgiving and the bags to unpack, I am a bit overwhelmed. I just read a friends blog about making lists and how it will help you feel like you accomplished something. I will do this, after I get off the comfy couch and write for the first time since Halloween. <div><br /></div><div>My life has been busy blessed the past few months in ways I couldn't have planned. In August and September I had the experience of being with a friend who was near the end of his life. I was fortunate to spend time with him and share my special thoughts about our relationship. How often do you share with people what they mean to you in a specific way? Two weeks before he passed I found out I was pregnant with our third baby. I was thrilled and not sure how to share such happy news, at such a sad time in my life. I found myself reflecting on life, birth and death and their similarities. It became important to me to be sure my friend felt safe and secure in this unknown time. I started seeing a possible future for my work I do with families. I may, at some point when my kids are older, work with hospice and help people transition from life to death in a peaceful way. As I helped plan with his celebration of life, I felt the need to remind people to cherish what they have daily. To not hold on to regrets, to make special traditions. Meanwhile I was holding on to this beautiful secret of life. </div><div><br /></div><div>When I finally had a ultrasound picture and was about 12 weeks, we decided to share the news with our kids. They were thrilled and immediately started sharing the news with everyone we knew! With the news of a baby, brought up the concern of space. We are a family of 4 almost 5 and my husband has to have a office for work, we also home school. So, we are starting to evaluate the space we have and what is best for our family. We are starting to declutter every space and as we do this we are able to see what is really important and what we need. We have had 2 grandma's go through some health changes that have made us more aware of the constant change in life. We are close with our family and want to help as much as possible. We know there is a possibility of having a family member live with us and they will be a welcomed addition. </div><div><br /></div><div>My husband has also had the opportunity for a new job, which I always feel so blessed when he is in demand. He was faced with a decision to take a job for more money and another organization or to move up within the team he works for and get a raise. He decide that family was the most important. So he will stay with his team and be here more. I am excited for him to be around more with this pregnancy, than the other 2. </div><div><br /></div><div>So, as I sit here, realizing that I still have list to make in order to go out of town for 2 more Thanksgivings, I am blessed in simple ways. I have family, friends, a warm home and a job. I need nothing. Going shopping doesn't even appeal to me, we have too much. So, as you sit and reflect on the traditions you have for the up coming holiday, see how you can simplify to enjoy what you have. Make experiences come to life. Not just wrap a bunch a plastic toys that will be over looked in a few weeks. Do things for others. Recycle and share you talents and passions. Enjoy the rest of your holiday weekend. </div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-19226176697514944942010-11-05T07:27:00.000-07:002010-11-05T07:49:10.644-07:00Halloween Candy FunWe are all about health and wellness, except when it comes to Halloween candy! I believe that traditions are important and kids have fun memories of trick or treating. For the last 5 years we have a had a huge party. It was originally created because the kids were little and we didn't want them to go trick or treating. Well as kids change, so do traditions. They are older and understand the concept of collecting a lot of candy. They were so exciting they both made a map of the neighborhood, planning their route! We went to three different areas, in an effort to see friends and family along the way. After returning the kids began to trade candy. Then they started sorting their candy. The next day it continued again. We then made a candy bar graph. They then did addition problems to figure out how much candy they had in all. <div><br /></div><div>We heard about this program called Operation Gratitude, where local dentists collect candy and send it to the troops. We decided to divide our candy in three groups, the troop pile being the biggest. We then went and asked kids on the street, our park day friends and family to donate to the cause. We found a local dentist who was participating and brought the candy there. The receptionist was thrilled to see us walk in with four grocery size bags of candy! We got to help weigh it all in a teeny scale. We came up with 28 lbs.!!! Shocking! The next part was a surprise for he kids, the dentist pays $1 per pound of candy. So when they were handed $28 in ones, they thought they were rich!! We also made cards to send to the troops. This was a great community project and a nice way to share the sweets.</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-21224839466559412122010-10-14T07:26:00.000-07:002010-10-14T07:52:47.610-07:00I'm Having a Art Sale, Today!My children are budding artists, of course it runs in the family. Monday night James suggested that Cade have a sale at Second Saturday. Often small vendors will set up on the sidewalks downtown and sell their work. Well Cade was so excited, he insisted on doing it the next day. He made a sign that said "Art Viewing and Sale." He planned to serve lemonade and probably sell the painting for $10 a piece. As a momma, I was trying to be encouraging, but also wanted him to be successful. I suggested it just be a preview for Second Saturday and that he could except donations. Well he was determined. At about 20 minutes before kids got out of the school around the corner, he ran and hung his sign. He sent his sister inside to make lemonade and set up the art table. I helped hang the art work on a rope line with clothes pins. As children came home they stopped by and were served lemonade and looked at art work. Cade didn't expect any money from them, although a few put in a quarter. They would comment on their favorite pieces and ask questions about the water color technique. After the 3 families had walked by, he then went and invited our elderly neighbors. He told them he was selling paintings for $5 a piece. They said they would come in a half and hour. When they came, the kids greeted them politely and served them lemonade. The couple asked how much it was to go through the tour and Cade said a donation would be fine. Cade proceeded to take them to each painting and discuss the colors, movement and overall feeling he had. They were so impressed by his excitement and ability to share what he had done. They paid $2 for the tour and thanked him. Cade then asked if they would like to take a painting home. They discussed which one impressed them and decided on the sunrise to hang in their garage; where they hang out every morning. They asked how much the painting was and Cade said they paid enough. What a bargain and deal for our friends. He didn't focus being greedy to get the money he wanted for some toy, just the process and enjoyment he gave to this couple. They complimented our family for the nice things we do and how we get them involved. It made their day and mine!balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-80313892296695723202010-09-20T07:07:00.000-07:002010-09-20T08:26:51.021-07:00The Cycle of LifeI sit here this gloomy morning, trying to embrace the quiet house. I am saddened by the passing of a dear friend for over 20 years. I was searching the Internet for the perfect quote to try and send my condolences to the family. There are no words I can say to make it better, especially with the loss in my heart. <div><br /></div><div>We live in a society that hardly talks about the death process. We expect that when we are old we will die. We don't expect that a young 39 year old can die. We also hardly talk about birth, just the horror stories. I have had the honor of working with pregnant couples for 9 years. Over this time, I have observed some needs that humans have. During that time I have had a few grandparents pass or be near death. In those experiences I have seen some similarities with birth. There are three types of relaxation that the body goes through: physical, mental and emotional. With either situation, you want to help the person be comfortable physically. This is the easiest part and often the only issue covered in birth and death. It is easy to rub a sore muscle or give a pain killer. The next two types of relaxation are what I feel are missing in both cases. I prepare my couple for all three, but they really have to embrace them, because they will not have much support if in a hospital setting. If they have a home birth, a midwife is well aware of physical, mental and emotional relaxation and has the tools to help you. I assumed when you are going through the death process and have hospice in the home, that they would cover all three. I was saddened to see my friend getting the best physical care, but I felt something was missing. I had a wonderful conversation with him 3 weeks ago about life and death. I talked about how fortunate he was to be at home with his family to care for his physical needs. I asked him what he was thinking about mentally. I talked to him about places to go to mentally, like a ocean, river or mountain top. Then we talked about the emotional side, the feeling safe with the process and the people helping him. He seemed touched by the gesture of my concern for the whole experience. He kept grabbing my hand and saying I love you. I told him about how the memories were going to keep his spirit alive. I have so many pictures that are of fun times. As he no longer wanted visitors I also recognized the need to retreat, to go inward. Mom's who are birthing naturally need to go into a deep trance like state to focus on nothing but what is happening. If they have unresolved issues it will hold up the birth process. The mind is powerful and can keep the body alive. The other part that I thought was nice, was the dark and calm environment. As I was there to help the last week, I represented the calm, strength and courage. I just kept telling him what a great job he was doing and how he was handling this part of the journey. This process has brought some clarity to me and also helped me recognize a special calling I may have. In birth and death it should be peaceful, feel safe and beautiful. This can be done with some guidance, as in birth you may hire a doula, in death a special friend. I feel honored that he was a part of my life. Today I will embrace my family and feel the love we share.</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-24396513994269554992010-09-16T07:08:00.001-07:002010-09-16T07:52:56.123-07:00Being PresentMy new strategy this year in school is to be more conscious and present. As we start our day, I pay attention to important details like moods, amount of sleep, eating patterns, dad's travel schedule, etc. If any one of these areas are off, it can effect the flow of the day. The children will be focused on other things and not school work. This is a skill in itself, to adjust the day as we go. I have always thought the topics being taught need to be relevant to their life and what they are interested in. I have an overall theme for the month and we address the subjects across the theme. I ask the kids about field trip ideas and fit those in to the year plan. <div><br /></div><div>So, the other day daddy had a 3 hour conference call. We had to try and be quiet the whole time. This fell on the only day we have to stay home and have uninterrupted learning opportunities. I wasn't sure how it would go, but we did great! We did a lot of Lego building, which is math and science. They also practiced presenting their projects, fielding questions as well. We decided to make a newsletter for all the activities we do on the street. Each child reported an article about their interests. Cade's story was about the Lego club and Josie's was about the baby club. We read about a girl immigrating from Europe and her experience on the boat. We saw that the wealthy got to have tea and play cards. So, we did the same! When daddy came out we were on the ship (table) drinking tea and playing cards (uno). What a fun way to incorporate history, social studies, geography, math, manners, etc. This book also reminded us of the gold rush days festival, we went to a few weeks ago. We made the best of our day and it didn't look at all like the traditional classroom lesson. That's the thing about homeschooling that is the greatest, you get to play and learn with your kids! You really know where they are at, what they understand and when to move on. I have learned it is ok not to finish something. Sometimes, I have had a culminating project idea in mind and they are not interested anymore. The experience is enough to build a learning record in their mind that they will refer to for years. </div><div><br /></div><div>In order to be present, you have to be flexible, which isn't my strong point. I have always had big expectations and get disappointed when they don't happen. Take each moment as it happens and watch your children, see how they are enjoying the activity or not. Take what they are getting out of the experience and build on that. If they are collecting praying mantis's and having fun with friends, why not make green ice cream and call it praying mantis cream! There is no right or wrong, what you are doing is right!</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-78489191780846393452010-09-02T07:40:00.000-07:002010-09-02T07:53:15.327-07:00A Lesson on Sports InjuriesMy son is a super soccer player! He plays hard and shows determination when facing an opponent. He had practice the other night and was doing a drill, where you run full force at the other player and try to kick the ball. He was so excited, jumping around, preparing mentally, then the coached yelled go!! He took off and the other kid kicked my son right in the knee. He fell right down and didn't pop back up like usual. I sat back, as the coaches encouraged him to get up and walk it off. He hobbled over to the side and fought back tears. The coaches and parents were giving suggestions for drugs to give him, including vicadin! He made it to the car. We decided to try our natural approach, of remaining calm, assessing the situation and following the RICE procedure. Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevate. Along with this technique, we began treatment with our first aide kit of Young Living Essential Oils. First started with the Ortho Ease massing oil, it warms and goes directly into the skin and blood stream. Then we applied Thieves, which was chosen because it has cloves, which is a anti inflammatory. I used Abundance for the ginger in it, also anti inflammatory. All these oils are pure, grown in organic soil and distilled at the highest quality. The oils raise the frequencies, bring life back to the area, rubbed on and the person. We are seeing good results, without the side effects of drugs!balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5399475178961237471.post-90134948150861498842010-08-26T21:05:00.000-07:002010-08-26T21:21:24.044-07:00How to CENTER Yourself in the Midst of the StormI spoke last week, at a homeschool conference. The workshop was called, "You Can Have Balance." Funny thing was, I wasn't feeling very balanced last week. As I drove off, from my house, to run a few errands and check in for the conference, I found myself overwhelmed and feeling like a hypocrite. How can I tell these people, who I are paying to see me, how to have balance?! I then recalled my tool for centering myself and began the affirmations and deep breathing. I was able to move forward through my night and a had a great workshop! I would like to share the centering sequence I found useful.<div><br /></div><div><b>C</b>-come to a complete stop and say to yourself "I am completely stopping."</div><div><b>E</b>-embrace the moment and say "I am embracing this moment."</div><div><b>N</b>-name your work, what is it you need to accomplish right then? Say, "I am going to do:_____"</div><div><b>T</b>-trust your resources (what help do you have, who will help you if your are drowning ?) Say, "I trust my resources."</div><div><b>E</b>-expect nothing, drop all set ideas of how you want it to go. Say, "I expect nothing."</div><div><b>R</b>-return with strength, saying, "I will return with strength."</div><div><br /></div><div>This sequence, when written on cards around the home, will soon be memorized and can help you center anywhere! It will take you 1-2 minutes to do the sequence. Isn't it worth your sanity and relationships around you, to take the time? You Can Have Balance!</div>balancedmommahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15394975109011782499noreply@blogger.com